Drunk or Seeing How Much They Can Move Around Without Falling

Here is a case where you make the call... these two men dancing horribly or drunk and just trying to see how far they can make erractic movements without falling?

You make the call... leave the comment below!

Height Conscious

This really isn't news but it was a funny thought in a photo and a helpful reminder to short guys and gals to be conscious of who they hang with and pose in a picture with.

~Grow Taller Today!~

If you remember the funny Katt Williams joke that when he met Shaq, he was starring directing at Shaq's...you know what.

At any rate, we thought this photo would give short people the awareness to know who they are posing in pictures with. This guy (in the red shirt on Lebron's right (your left)) posing next to NBA star Lebron James, finds himself pointing at Lebron's...well you know what (not funny for him).

This is just a public service announcement to be 'height conscious' or to have height awareness. Thank you.

Randall Watson
Chicago Funnies

Condoleezza Rice & the NFL

Condoleezza Rice may be the new Rice for the San Francisco 49ers. After she becomes gainfully unemployed on January 20, 2009; the Secretary of State may look into a position with the 49ers.

She is a big football fan; and always dreamed of having the dream job of NFL Commissioner. And you thought she was a nerd. This is who every guy wants to hang out with on Sundays. Just think she can give you all the skinny on George W. Bush. Football, beer, and laugh at President Bush stories (funny).

I would like to see her do that; but I think it's hard to go from Sec of State to Exec of 49ers. Maybe the Chicago Bears would be a better pick.

Randall Watts

Chicago Funnies

China-Man Nearly loses his "wee-wee"

Opening night of the Beijing Olympics, in Hong Kong, the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble.

Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.

The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to masturbate. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole. Dude, it's called Johnson and Johnson's, it's called Vaseline, it's called KY-jelly (funny).

Who puts their 'wee-wee' in something that is not lubricated.

The man panicked and called the police to help him. I can't imagine the embarrassment and the pain. Watch the video here.

Chicago Funnies - Hong Kong Funnies actually (funny).

Russia Bullying Georgia: Says President Bush

"When will you stop taking my lunch money," one kid ask? The other kid says, "if you bring me $200 I will leave you alone."

"Deal, says the one kid." He brings him the $200 bucks and they part. Immediately the next day the other kid says; "buy me lunch today."

This is the conversation between Russia (the other kid) and Georgia (the kid).

It's the age old bully verse classmates. And now it has received the attention of President Bush. Uh oh. The last time he intervened in another country's dispute, we are still disputing (not funny).

The president said the Cold War is over and that a contentious relationship with the United States is not in Russia's interests. Bush said "bullying and intimidation are not acceptable ways to conduct foreign policy in the 21st century."

Seemed to work in Iraq? No one knows where this is going; but hopefully not into another war.

I'm Randall Watson

Chicago Funnies

Farve Back with Green Bay Packers

This isn't funny to Chicago - Brett Favre, 3 time MVP is back with the GB Packers. Those in different countries may or may not know about the rivalry between the Bears and Packers - but what you may have heard is the ongoing events with Brett Farve coming out of retirement.

The Green Bay Packers called his bluff; and Farve wasn't bluffing. The big question now is will he be the main go-to-guy, or will the stuff the future hall of famer on the bench?

Aaron Rodgers, Farve's back up for the last 3 years says he is ready to compete this year:
"I’m a competitor. I’m going to compete,” Rodgers said after a scrimmage Sunday night. “This isn’t going to be easy. It’s going to be a dogfight. And I know if they do open it up to competition, not a lot of people give me a chance, but I believe in myself and I’m going to be the best I can be and let coach decide from there.”

Good luck with that. Packers can still trade Farve or make him eat on the bench - whatever the end result is Chicago Funnies want the Chicago Bears to beat the Packers, no matter who is leading them.

Chicago Funnies
Randall W.

Get Background on your Hired Hit Man

Feds say a Florida construction company owner attempted to hire a hit-man to murder an IRS agent to avoid paying $300,000 in taxes.

"A U.S. Treasury agent says in an affidavit that Randy Nowak in June agreed to pay an undercover FBI agent $20,000 to kill agent Christine Brandt, who was auditing him. Nowak thought the FBI agent was a hit man."

The FBI agent who went undercover said he knew he was in when Nowak forgot to ask for identification.

"I was mad at myself for actually taking my FBI badge to the initial meeting, but when he forgot to ask ID - I was like...I'm so in there," said the FBI Agent.

If you plan on hiring a hit man in the future - don't be intimidated to ask questions. Just because they are hit men doesn't mean they are so mean and tough (funny). Get your questions answered up front.

Chicago Funnies

Due Daniels

Ref Gets 15 Months

If you've ever wanted to get a ref for blowing a call - here is your chance... or not. Yesterday, attorneys for Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who admitted to betting on basketball games he officiated, filed a psychological "evaluation" that blames his crimes on compulsive gambling.

I hope he is not in jail roomed up with guy who bet on games he officiated (funny). Donaghy was suppose to have a more extensive sentence. His compulsive gambling was his plea.

The plea worked. Today, Donaghy was sentenced to 15 months in prison instead of the 27 to 33 months that had been expected. Note to everyone, do a crime have psychological behavior ready as your plea.

Chicago Funnies

Due Danielz